By Bryan Russo
Below is a hypothetical track listing of (what we hope will always be) the mythical Christmas album released by Mr. Christmas himself: Kanye West.
- O Little Town of Chi-Town featuring Common
- Jingle My Bells
- Santa’s Scrimpin’ (a harsh protest against St. Nick and his apparent lack of gift giving in the ghetto)
- Greatest X-Mas Of All Time, (A rap battle with Santa, featuring Taylor Swift singing the hook)
- Christmas Time is Here (featuring Alvin and the Chipmunks)
- (I’m) Santa Baby!
- Gold Digger ‘09 (Christmas re-mix) featuring Jamie Foxx (still pretending to be Ray Charles)
- Diamonds From Miss Dionne (featuring Dionne Warwick)
- Blue Christmas (an auto-tune masterpiece duet with T-Pain)
- O’ Christmas Tree (You Ain’t As Dope As Me)
- Hark the Herald Hear Me Sing, Angels….(featuring Diddy)
- (I wish that I had) Jay-Z’s Girl